Ask anybody who knew my mother well and you’ll get stories of her positive attitude, her love of people and how she was a leader; in the Gaines family she was born into, and the Jones family she married into. Oh…and they may mention how she liked giving you a loving maul with her fist in the fleshy part of your arm…just to show she cared!
Irene Patricia Gaines Jones was born on April 4, 1926 and died on April 26, 1992 of respiratory distress syndrome within a week of getting sick. Twenty years ago today. Much too soon. Only four years after she retired from 39 years teaching sixth grade and serving as part-time librarian in Worth County, Georgia.
She was known by many names: Ms. Irene, Ms. Jones, Rene (by close family members) Jones (by her co-workers) and of course: Ma. She had one sister and two brothers, all raised by my stern and loving grandmother, Arlena Hinson, without the help of my mother’s father, Rob Gaines who—from what I know—was really never even talked about. How I wish we had.
So now, many times April 26th comes and goes without me noticing and I know that’s a good thing, because it means that I am in the process of life and that’s where my mother spent her time. Her favorite quote, told to us countless times growing up: “Can killed Can’t and they got in behind Couldn’t and haven’t seen him since.”
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I love the pictures and the story. I can see where you get your beautiful smile. And I am so glad that you wrote the quote down about Can killed can’t. I remember hearing you say that but couldn’t remember the entire phrase. Now I’ve got it. Great words of wisdom.
Very moving Anita. I love learning of your history and seeing (you!) in your beautiful mother. Wonderful!
Thanks and thanks! Feeling real good this morning after pouring myself into that post last night. Filled me up!
Irene always gave me that “maul” in the shoulder, telling me, “Be good, or I’m gon’ beat-choo-up!!!”
Oh yeah…she loved herself some son-in-law Rob!
A lovely tribute!
Hi Anita:
you’ve brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart today as I remember the generosity of your parents as they allowed me to be “one of their daughters” at Guilford College when I was far from home. I thank God that I knew them and had the privilege of knowing their awesome daughters. Thank you for unselfishly sharing them with me then and now. (ps: the 1956 picture is my favorite one, also. It speaks volumes about their relationship). You are now the keeper of the dream; and it is in great hands! Love, Peace and Joy, Pat
Now you’re bringing tears to MY eyes! Thanks, Pat. My mom took many a Albany State College student under her wings during our years on Hazard Drive. And when they thanked her she’d say, “You don’t have to thank me. Some day my girls will need help and I can rest assured that somebody will be there for them, too.” Ain’t that the truth!
Wow, I think of Grandma all the time. I, being her oldest grandson was BLESSED to have my own daughter born on April 4th, Deana. I have so many great memories of grandma, but my favorite of all is how she would get up and make me a pot of grits at 2am in the morning, It would make my mother mad, but Grandma would send her to bed, and I loved that. Grandma pretty much made grits whenever I wanted them. I had a love for grits, and even more for her HOME MADE BISCUITS! OMG!
Love you Grandma,
Derrick
Humph, humph, humph. I know that’s right…Ma could makes some grits. She was a fantastic cook. Thanks for these memories Derrick!
Anita,
Thank you for this touching post. Though we barely know each other, your kind and lovely character shines through the loving description of your mother. Having lost both of my parents, my father at 54, and my mother just three years ago at 76, I often recall their many sayings and witticisms that still elicit a laugh today. Keep keeping the memories alive!
Dana
Thanks, Dana. It’s so true…we can all look to the positive memories to carry us.
Omg~ sooo sweet n real – that plaid cotton dress and white strappy shoes – mmmm – but the relationship is what really shines thru – there is some big love there!!! thank you for this lovely story of strong folks making a difference ~ Tura
Yeah…the clothes and cars are a special treat but you’re right, Tura…it’s the LOVE that shines through!
I feel like I know her now Anita. Can’t wait till my Ms. Irene plant blooms. Hey, your dad was pretty fine too!
So many memories!!!!
Your parents were phenomenal!!!!
I will never forget youy mother’s quick wit! She had a word for EVERYTHING!!! As I read this blog my face started hurting from smiling so much! I even remember your grandmother who lived with your family! Those were indeed the best years I’d my life.
For anyone reading this blog who did not know Mrs. Jones, you missed a treat! One deep, smart, kind, loving, caring woman! Truly Anita has her mothjer’s blood running through her veins!
And the pictures . . . I could only bob my head and say WOW! I really remember seeing some of them at you house in Albany! I truly look forward to this blog every week! Thanks for awakening my memory of that time on our lives. Now, you MUST blog about your/our school days at Hazard Laboratory, Carver Jr. High and Monroe High Schools and the wonderful educators we had! Oh, the stories!!!!
Hey Gail!
This is your cousin Erick here. I was just doing some searching on the internet and I ran across this blog. This is a very beautiful tribute to a very beautiful person! I know I haven’t heard from you in several years and I hope all is well with you and your family! The main thing I remember from Aunt Irene is that not only was she an aunt to my mom who offered advice and a listening ear, but she was also a true dear friend who never hesistated to tell her like it was. Her and my mom would talk on the phone almost everyday. When I was a kid, I can remember going to her house and looking at all of the magnets on the refrigerator and being amazed at all of the different places she and Uncle Silas had been to get them. I also remember the exact moment when Mom learned Aunt Irene passed and I had never heard her cry the way she did. It broke my heart. I also remember how jolly and full of positive energy she was. She was a wonderful woman and the world was truly a happier place when she was in it.
Shoot me a email Gail, I would like to keep in touch!
-Erick
Hello Gail, I hope that all is well with your new endeavors and your family. I have been trying to contact you via facebookl with no response. My brother, Erick just informed me about your blog and your new book. Congrats. He also told me that your are working hard on your completion of your new book. I know that it has been a very long time since I last spoke to you. Leila is now 6yrs old. Would love to send you some pictures and catch up on our life events. Also, i wanted to comment on Aunt Irene. She was an inspiration for me throughout my life in the military throughout the years. I always received letters and cards of encouragement on all occasions from Aunt Irene. Her letters and cards always made my tours of duty tolerable and made me believe that someone in state side was thinking about me and truly loved me. Hopefully, we can continue her legacy to keep in touch. Go your destiny.
-Ursula
Ursula!! So good to hear from you ~ this is why I love blogging! Thanks so much for these rememberances of Mama and yes indeed, let’s keep the legacy going.
I love this and it feels so good finding family and knowing that I had and have a great family. Gail l’m so very proud of you and the work you are doing to carry on a legacy. How well I remember those days the visit from Albany to Vada, we were always glad to see you guys. Keep up the good work love you and I miss Betty always sweet and kind, Aunt Irene giving, caring and a smile that would make you feel that everything would be alright, then there was Uncle Silas and the hunting dogs. Wow! There is so much more to be said you were surrounded by great people with a life worth talking about. please keep this going.